Ep. 005: Director Spotlight – Adrian Lyne

You’ll have noticed that we’ve mention Adrian Lyne before, both in passing and when we discussed his 2002 film, Unfaithful, back in episode 001. You’ll probably also have noticed that we previously said his name wrong. Yes, well, I doubt that’s the only time we’ll end up misplacing the right way to say someone’s name. But now, thanks to a behind-the-scenes piece I watched in preparation for this episode, we at least have his name going in the right direction this time around.

But obviously there’s a whole lot more our discussion has to offer than a well-pronounced name.

Adrian Lyne is a very important topic for any discussion about sex in film, since he has single-handedly provided it with some of it’s most iconic entries. And it’s hard, as a sexy-film buff, not to have missed his presence these past few years. So, in an effort to rekindle the appreciation for this man’s work, and his detailed (if sometimes unavoidably dated) aesthetic, we’re here to revisit some of his most memorably sexy films. We’ll focus mostly on his films Fatal Attraction (1987), 9 1/2 Weeks (1986) and Lolita (1997), with some passing references to Flashdance (1983) and Jacob’s Ladder (1990). His most recent film, Unfaithful (2002) was covered in Episode 001.

 

p.s. The actress whose name I can’t think of when we discuss naturally crazy hair (you’ll know what I’m talking about when you get there)… Alex Kingston. Love her! (And her hair, for that matter.)

You can find the Pinterest album for this episode here.

 

Welcome! Please, Let Us Introduce Ourselves…

Welcome to NotPorn: The Sex in Film Podcast!

 

Here we are at last! It was a longer, harder road getting here than we expected when we first made our decision to start a podcast, but it was well worth the effort. We are so excited about sharing this project with you!

 

So, who are we really, and what are we doing here? Well, the bones of the matter are pretty simple… I’m Lyra, a “Library Information Technician” (fancy wording for ‘I work in a library, but am paid far less than a librarian’) at our local community college library. Laura is even stingier with her personal statistics and is going with “works in the mental health field.”

Pretty ironic that we’ve chosen to record ourselves talking about one of the most intimate subjects imaginable and then post it for all the world to hear! But there it is. We are nothing if not a mess of contradictions.

 

“But, dammit all,” you say, “Why sex in film?!”

 

Well, yes, there’s that. And in the beginning, all we really knew was that we wanted to make a podcast. It’s something we’d both been interested in doing, separately, for quite some time. Laura has been an avid podcast listener for a few years now, so her interest was obvious. I had not yet discovered the pleasures of being a podcast listener, because where I live is rural enough to not have anything in the way of connectivity outside of dial-up. Media downloads are impossible, and using Wi-Fi entails a trip into town, and that’s a half-hour drive each way. (If you could take a moment to appreciate that fact as you read this post, I’d be much obliged.) My own desire to do a podcast came mostly from the exuberant childhood memories of recording pretend radio shows with my best friend on my treasured old cassette deck. I should add that when we decided to undertake this project I did make the effort to download as many podcasts as my iPod could hold and I am now a rampant podcast listener! But back to our origin story…

 

Eventually, Laura brought up the topic of making a podcast during one of our typical hours-long conversations. We were instantly excited about the prospect! And entirely clueless about the process!

 

Honestly, it took almost no time at all for us to come up with our subject matter. It was all too obvious. In an episode of the Daily Show where Jerry Seinfeld was discussing his web series, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee, he described the show as ‘what he would be doing anyway’. You wish to know why we chose to do a podcast where we talk about sex in movies and television? Because that’s what we would be doing anyway.

 

Laura and I have always been interested in the topic of sexuality. It’s a bedrock element in our over-a-decade-long friendship. We’re interested in the science of it, the seriousness of it, the silliness of it… hell, why not the alliteration of it?! That is truly a fuckload of S’s happening in a single subject.

And we love movies. I mean, LOVE movies. Speaking for myself, I consume them like a sugar addict let loose in a See’s candy factory. My DVD collection is obscene. In size! Obscene in size!

 

The subjects of sex and film together are a match made in heaven for the two of us and we talk about them, and how they intersect, all the time. So now we’re recording it. And now… after the numerous trials and tribulations that can probably be imagined when you picture two technologically inexperienced young ladies slowly learning their way through the process, and just generally not really knowing what the fuck they’re doing… you get to hear all about it! How stoked do you feel right now?! Preeeetty stoked, I bet. Well, have at it, my friends. Our willful embarrassment of ourselves awaits!

 

Ep. 001: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly… In Sex Scenes

Explicit

Sex scenes. They’re why we’re here really. Oh sure, we like discussing sexiness and sexy traits and the chemistry of two characters and their sexual tension… we like all the little bells and whistles of the natural ephemera surrounding sex in film… but at the heart of it all? Sex scenes.

At best, they provide us with an idealized fantasy… a place where the passion and chemistry of the moment is truly able to whip two (or more) people into a frenzy of desire and perfectly shaped parts, free of the sometimes awkwardly hilarious moments that real life graces us with, like when your partner unknowingly thrusts you into a face-wedge between the couch cushions. The best in sex scenes are not the most common, however, as much as you might assume otherwise. It would seem like the ability to plan and script such a moment would allow for the best possible outcome most of the time, but most of them fall squarely into maybe-better-than-your-average-reality, but not sensational. Or at least, that’s how Laura and I see it. Being that sex, like many things, is a very subjective matter, you may find yourself liking more or less of what cinema has to offer. Personally, we’re still on the hunt for our Great-White-Whale of all sex scenes.

Now, sex scenes at their worst… that’s a whole different mountain to scale. And the reaction you have to a bad sex scene can be a much more varied experience. They can range from hilariously ridiculous to stomach-churningly repulsive. They can make you giggle, roll your eyes, or end up putting your mood on the shelf for weeks.

This time around we’re treating you to a little smorgasbord of sex scenes. We’ve got examples of the really good ones, the just plain bad ones and those of the eye-wateringly queasy variety. Below you’ll find the breakdown of who chose which movie:

 

The Good:

 

Laura – The stairwell scene from Unfaithful (2002)

Lyra – The head-girl-loses-her-virginity-on-the-couch scene from Tormented (2009)

(honorable mention to the screwing-in-the-backseat scene in Tormented as well)

 

The Bad:

 

Laura – The fingerbang-on-the-rollercoaster scene from Fear (1996)

(Ok, yes, that one is not a full-blown sex scene. Untwist your panties.)

Lyra – The orgasm-over-a-cliff sex scene from Underworld: Rise of the Lycans (2009)

 

The Ugly:

 

Laura – The Butter Scene from Last Tango in Paris (1972)

Lyra – The two rough-sex-while-under-the-influence-of-a-demonic-walking-stick scenes from

The Covenant: Brotherhood of Evil (aka Canes – 2006)

 

I have one last little piece of insight into this episode to share before we get down to business. As I have mentioned before, we are incredibly inexperienced in the realm of recording audio. I think anyone with a halfway decent ear for such things will notice an embarrassing level of audio amateurishness in our first episodes, something we hope to improve upon as we learn more about the process. But we were anxious to get the show on the road, and jumped in par-baked. This led to a variety of problems, only some of which actually show in the final product. The behind-the-scenes difficulties were much more hilariously frustrating.

For one, the first three recordings we made were thoroughly fucked due to some driver issues. The Introduction track was still understandable (and I may someday include a bonus post that transcribes the best parts of that one that didn’t make it into the re-record.) The other two were so consumed by sound issues that it’s hard to make out the words! The second try, on a different computer with a different software set up, did much better, but for some still undecipherable reason, episode one degraded into static after the one-hour mark. We got it all done in the end, obviously, but what we really want you to take away from this over-share is this: We had to talk about the massive piece of crap that is The Covenant: Brotherhood of Evil, THREE GODDAMN TIMES!!! You have no idea how fatiguing it is to discuss a movie you hated (and had already gone to a ridiculous amount of effort to watch… and re-watch) until you have to drag yourself through doing it, in triplicate. It’s like one of those horror movies where you end up cursed if you watch it… only instead of dying, you’re doomed to have the whole experience repeat on you like cinematic acid reflux.

You can also find the Pinterest album for this episode here. Trailers, stills and poster images… good stuff!

Now, go forth and enjoy our pain!

Ep. 002: Sex In Film, 2015 So Far – Fifty Shades & The Boy Next Door

Explicit

Sex in Film 2015…

Let’s start out with some basic honesty… this episode was recorded by two young ladies who had just split an entire bottle of wine. This fact may, or may not, become apparent to you, our listeners, most likely depending on how well you already know us. Aside from that, the episode title is pretty self-explanatory. Mainstream cinema hasn’t had a lot to offer connoisseurs of sex scenes in the more recent history. We’re excited about the prospect the success of these two films might offer in the way of a renewed interest in sex in film. We’re much less excited about these two particular films in-and-of themselves. But that distinction is what this episode is basically all about, so let’s just go ahead and get down to it…

You can find the Pinterest album for this episode here.

Ep. 003: Guilty Pleasures

Explicit

Awww, guilty pleasures. They can happen to us in the form of music (if you think I never listen to that Bobby McFerrin CD I bought when I was 13, you’re dead wrong!) They can happen to us in the form of places and things we like to eat (McDonald’s french fries, anyone?) They can even happens to us in articles of clothing (get rid of the jean jacket that’s practically armored in 1-inch band name buttons?! Never!) But it would be hard to top the blush-inducing guilty pleasure that is a movie that maybe you’d rather not let on really gets you going. Certainly Laura and I can come up with more than just one, so I’d guess this will be an occasionally reoccurring topic… but for this, our first foray into the sexy-cinema-guilt-factory, we’ll stick to one example apiece.

 

Lyra’s pick: Original Sin (2001)

Laura’s pick: Wild at Heart (1990)

 

You can find the Pinterest album for this episode here.

Let the blushing ensue!

Ep. 004: Actor Spotlight – Michael Fassbender

Michael Fassbender. Is there a man alive who makes me more aware of my own sexual orientation? Probably not. But it’s not all gauzy curtains and mood lighting with this one. Oh no, he’s got to go and make you question your humanity a little. Way to keep me a little off kilter, Mr. Fassbender, but this isn’t supposed to be a Guilty Pleasure episode, for crying out loud! Laura fares a little better than I do, ultimately, but at least he’s given us a great deal to talk about. We mostly focus on his work in Shame (2011), Fish Tank (2009) & A Dangerous Method (2011) with a few quick mentions about Jane Eyre (2011), Prometheus (2012), Inglourious Basterds (2009) & his role as Magneto in the newest X-Men movies.

You can find the Pinterest album for this episode here.